Friday, November 23, 2007

Fun Things to Do in an Elevator

So I just found this online and I was busting up the whole time I was reading it, enjoy!!




Fun Things to Do in an Elevator

  • Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

  • Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

  • Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

  • Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

  • Sell Girl Scout cookies.

  • On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

  • Shave.

  • Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

  • Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

  • Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

  • When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

  • Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

  • Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

  • One word: Flatulence!

  • On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

  • Do Tai Chi exercises.

  • Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

  • When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, motion sickness!"

  • Give religious tracts to each passenger.

  • Meow occassionally.

  • Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

  • Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

  • Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.

  • Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

  • Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

  • Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

  • Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

  • Leave a box between the doors.

  • Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

  • Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

  • Start a sing-along.

  • When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

  • Play the harmonica.

  • Shadow box.

  • Say "Ding!" at each floor.

  • Lean against the button panel.

  • Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

  • Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

  • Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

  • Bring a chair along.

  • Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"

  • Blow spit bubbles.

  • Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

  • Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

  • Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

  • Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

  • Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.

  • Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."

  • If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
  • 1 comment:

    S'mee said...

    Humming "It's a small world" would be easy enough to get away with and yet not far enough to get security. I will have to try that one!